Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Meet my Husband Part I

Today's math lesson lasted for about 5 minutes in my fourth grade classroom this morning.  It wasn't on purpose.  As a matter of fact, I like geometry (fourth grade geometry, that is!).  I was just a bit frazzled as we were going over homework, and I was telling my students why:  my car battery died this morning and I had to jump it with my husband's.  One of my students asked why my husband didn't help me, and another stated that my husband is is a wheelchair and that maybe he couldn't.   Yes, my husband is in a wheelchair.  (I explained that the real reason he couldn't help me was that he was in the shower.)

Yes, my husband is in a wheelchair.

I have never seen my husband stand.

I sat beside my husband when we said our wedding vows.

For about 30 minutes today, Math turned into a combo Health/Character class.  Health, as I told my students about my husband's condition, and Character, as I described how he, our sons and I live with his disability.  They were wide-eyed and fascinated.  They asked questions about Mike's disability and how he got in the wheelchair.

Mike has a condition known as Freidreich's Ataxia.  In a nutshell, Friedreich's Ataxia is an inherited condition that causes progressive damage to the nervous system resulting in symptoms ranging from gait disturbance and speech problems to heart disease.  Wikipedia really does do a good job describing it in layman's terms.

My husband was a normal kid growing up in Aiken.  He was quite the soccer player, being offered scholarships to small colleges around the southeast.  However, he chose to go to the University of South Carolina because of their business college.  It was there that he began to see signs:  slight dizziness, tripping, and some clumsiness.  He was diagnosed at age 20, started using a walker at age 30, and was finally in a wheelchair at age 37.  A financial engineer at the Savannah River Site, he retired three years ago.

I told my students that even though he has this disability, he leads as much of a normal life as most of us.  He just has to do things differently.  (Thus we like to say he has a "Diffability" as opposed to a disability.)  When we go out, we have to scout out parking places - and we curse all those fat sloths who use their grandmother's handicapped placards and slug themselves into the store!  We have to make sure there are handicapped ramps and doorways when we go to events and parties.  Even a six inch step can be a nightmare.  It's real fun to have Mike's friends and my friend's husbands "bump" him up steps.  That does not stop us from black-tie affairs or other social events.  We just PLAN AHEAD!

"But is it hard on you, Mrs. W.?" one of my students asked me.  Again, it's a "diffability".  No, it's not always easy.  But EVERYONE has something, don't they?


Mike, Jackson and me at the Aiken Steeplechase last spring.

28 comments:

  1. Bevy~ Thank you for sharing with us. You have a beautiful family. Your students received a very valuable lesson today. I'm so glad that I found you and your blog.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bevy as many of your readers will likely echo...I had no idea. I admire your family's positive attitude. I think that probably get y'all very far in life.

    Blessings,
    Kim

    ReplyDelete
  3. What a great lesson for your school kids! Its these lessons that last a lifetime:)
    Good job Mrs. W!

    ReplyDelete
  4. What a wonderful way to explain to your students about differences. It sounds like both of you are incredibly lucky to have found each other. Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My son is in 4th grade and while he loves his math teacher you sound amazing. I love they way you describe your husbands diffability. xoxo

    SC

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sounds like the kids learned something even more useful in class today! Thanks for sharing his story with us.

    ReplyDelete
  7. What a great lesson for your fourth graders and for the rest of us, too! Thanks for the glimpse into your life and for sharing your indomitable spirits, empowered by the Holy Spirit! (I'm coming to Aiken to meet you one of these days, SC sister!)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am so glad you addressed this because I'll be honest, I wanted to know, but I certainly didn't want to feel like I was being nosy or offensive for asking. Thanks so much for sharing...with us and your kids at school. You have an AMAZING family!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thank you for taking the time to share this with all of us here in blogland! I am thrilled to hear you changed your lesson plan for the day! . How important for the kids to hear this. Your kids are lucky to have you as their teacher:)

    ReplyDelete
  10. As a mother to a third grader, I can only imagine the questions you get asked on a daily basis. I think you must be an AWESOME teacher to care enough to share your life with your class while helping to teach them life lessons. I bet they were paying way more attention to you talking today than when you talk about right angles, etc. :)

    Thanks for sharing this with all of us here in blogland as well.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Diffability? I love it! You are an amazing teacher, wife, mother, and blogger!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I was curious like Laura, and I'm so thankful you shared your story with your students and with us. Your husband sounds like an amazing man, and we already know how amazing you are!! I think "difffability" is the perfect term. Thank you for sharing with us!! You are very loved in the blog world:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. What a wonderful, touching story ( and I love the picture at the end). Since I'm a fairly new reader maybe you've already written about how you and your husband met....I'd love to know!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Loved "meet my husband". I think I came across your blog from someone elses blog. You have a beautiful family. Best wishes. BTW...your husband is a super snappy dresser. Lovin' the madras shorts and the VV mermaid cords....absolutely awesome.
    Best wishes

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thank you so much for sharing a little bit of your family with us! Your students are very lucky to have a teacher who can impart great lessons about life and how everyone can live it to the fullest, (along with geometry!)
    Have a great day!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hi, I found your blog through the Beaufort Lookout. I love this post. And what a very cool lesson you were teaching your students. Sometimes lessons in life are more important than numbers. I like your blog. I hope you don't mind if I visit more often.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Thank you for sharing your family's story. I admire your family's outlook. And it's wonderful that your students have someone like you giving them guidance each day. :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Thank you for sharing that story. It's inspirational and what a lesson those kids learned! You are nothing short of amazing!

    ReplyDelete
  19. We're ready for the "how y'all met" story!

    ReplyDelete
  20. This only confirms why I so enjoy you!

    Jo

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hey, Bevy! You mentioned the other day that your hubby's family has a place in Edisto. Could I pick your brain on that area? My hubby was researching it last night online and it looks great. But, we're not sure what rental agency to go with, particular area to stay in, etc. So, any recommendations you may have would be much appreciated. Thanks! (My e-mail is jw6111@gmail.com)

    ReplyDelete
  22. What a great story! I always like reading your posts and this just goes to show everyone else that they need to read too. I also like the fact that your Hubs is a GAMECOCK!

    ReplyDelete
  23. I so enjoyed reading this post and learning more about you and your husband, Bevy. Thank you for sharing your story. You both are quite inspirational!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Good Evening,
    The last photo is just positively beaming with love!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Bevy,

    What a beautiful, heartfelt post! I love your outlook, your attitude and your heart. God has truly blessed you and given you an incredible family!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Love this post! Love the way you explained the differences to your students. And, may I say that I love your husband's shorts?! Very preppy husband you've got there:)

    ReplyDelete
  27. thanks for sharing the link with me, this is a great story, and I just love you take on things. And he is so handsome ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  28. just catching up on old posts of yours...amazing how it doesn't really matter - diffability/dissability, you are right - we all have something. at the end of the day we are accoutable for our hearts, we are grateful to love and be loved despite each of our imperfections. you two make a gorgeous couple -standing up or sitting down! :)

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for your sweet comments... They make my day just that more Golden!